In the most recent episode of, “Answers to Questions Nobody Asked”, I present to you a thing that may or may not exist but will at least get a few chuckles.
For those of you who have said to yourselves, “Self? I think my current golf cart is too carty, and I need something less typical and way, way goofier,” the GolfGlide CGV, or Compact Golf Vehicle may be for you. I swear to you this is what it is actually called and I am not making this up. It exists at that point between your traditional motorcycle with a luggage rack to which you’ve managed to strap your golf bag and that purpose-built golf cart that probably won’t get you kicked off the course, but might, the way you drive it. Right. Ready?
The inventor of said Compact Golf Vehicle (I can’t get over that this is a real acronym yet, give me a second) insists the first prototypes will be released in March. That’s next month. For now, all we have are some renderings, which purport to have a “beautiful modern design” but in fact remind me of the scooter Sarah Connor rode in The Terminator. I think it was a mid-80s Honda (It is, in fact, a first-gen Honda Elite – JM).
Anyway, it’s a dedicated golfing scooter. It was designed for golf. So, sadly, it probably won’t be street legal. Amongst the other touted but non-ball-washing features are:
- “Dual driving positions: [sitting] and standing,” like… every other motorcycle ever?
- “Unique E Brake, allow the car to stand still in inclined positions,” like most scooters you’ll come across!
- “Integrated Scorecard holder, Tee Holder, Ball Holder, Drink Holder.” Although, seriously, I could use a drink holder on more of my bikes. The second-gen KLR has one kind of by accident, just inside the fairing next to the radiator, and it will keep your coffee warm. I’m pretty sure this isn’t that.
- “In seat Cooler that fits up to 7 cans of any drink.” OK, you got me here. We all need this.
- “Sand/Seed dispenser.” I’m not a golfer, so I’m guessing this is for when, absent the ball you just sliced, you lob your divot into the woods in anger.
- “Umbrella stand.” I mean, who doesn’t need an umbrella stand?
- “Uses traditional Golf Cart Tires” for tight cornering and excellent handling. I would absolutely not track down some very knobby ATV tires with the same wheel diameter… and get kicked off the course for tearing up the greens.
While I have so very many questions, the one that pops to mind first and foremost is, doesn’t Harley have the copyrights to the name “Glide” when it comes to forms of two-wheeled transportation?
At any rate: Motorcyclists who are also golfers, here’s yet another dedicated golf scooter that might be more fun than a cart. We’ll certainly keep you posted if it ever makes its way out of the 3D renders.